Friendship should not come with conditions such as: if you do this then I’ll be your friend, if you agree with me we’re friends, if you are mad at this person too we can be friends, if you wear this...

Friendship should feel like a breath of fresh air, an easy connection, another person who gets you and your humor. It is something worth looking for, worth putting yourself out there for. If you are spending time with people who make you feel like you aren’t enough or you’re too much, then they are not your people and you should keep looking. But don’t give up! We need to do things on purpose to find our people and put in the effort to make connections.

For example, when you are in a group setting like a classroom, look for people who you might have something in common with, look for people who might need someone to talk to or could use some encouragement, and be warm to them. Start by asking questions like, “What did you do this weekend? Did you see this movie?, I’m looking to update my playlist, what are you listening to these days?”, Be warm and be curious.

We also need to join groups on purpose in order to meet people we might have things in common with. Join clubs, teams, classes and talk to people there. We need to actively look for our people and we need to not settle.